I started going to counseling again a couple of weeks ago to help me navigate through this weird time in my life. I explained that I am waiting to find the right job, community, and routine now that we had moved ten hours from home. He reminded me that when you are in the “waiting room,” it can be easy to feel frustrated, bored, and alone, but God is with you.
Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Wherever you go.
When you are going through the interview process.
When you are looking to make new friends.
When you are too tired, even the thought of doing a simple task overwhelms you.
God will be with you.
I have always fought against complacency, afraid that I will grow stagnant if I am too content. At times, this mindset has made me driven and goal-oriented, but it has also made me restless. I needed to realize there is a difference between contentment and complacency. Complacency says I am okay with the bad, and I will do nothing about it. Contentment says I am okay with the bad because I know God will do something about it. Complacency says I am okay with the harmful habits in my life and will never change. Contentment says I recognize where I need to change, but I know God is meeting me where I am as I grow. Contentment isn’t me pretending everything is great when it’s not, but it is me knowing God’s plan is better than mine.
He is moving even if we cannot feel it. Some things are not up to us, and when we have done all we can, it may be time to let God act instead. There is no need to rush to a place God has already prepared for us.
This is no easy task; I felt incredibly guilty when I allowed myself to wait on God instead of making my own way. Guilt is tricky because if it is real, we can make things right, and we can be released from the guilt. However, if the guilt is false, created by our own minds, then there is nothing we can do. I can’t make the guilt go away because I have nothing to feel guilty about. This is when I need to push the guilt away and preserve through the need to act and be still. Habits like that don’t change overnight, but even in the past couple of weeks, as I have practiced rest, it has become easier. My stomach is in less of a knot, and I am hopeful God will make a way because I know even in the waiting room, God is with me.